Be an Individual (before anything else)

Throughout your life, you'd be a part of multiple and various kinds of relationships. Which one is the most important one? The one with yourself. 

Are you married? Dating? Are you a parent? Are you a sibling? Are you a professional - business or employed? Your actions, responsibilities may be varying in each capacity but there is a constant - you as an individual. What do I mean by that? You're the net total of your experiences, conclusions you draw from them, ethics, morals, thought processes, habits, songs you hum, movies you love, shows you re-watch, books you read and literally everything that's been a part of your life closely and has had an impact.

The relationship you have with yourself is the most important for many reasons and hence needs to be worked upon, continuously. Why? Let's ponder together...

• Hear the unsaid. 
  Think of the closest person to you - someone you could trust blindly, someone you'd think of if you were drowning, someone you could trust with all the wealth you'd ever make. Now think of all the things you haven't told them - worst fears, the anxiety attacks you didn't think you'd survive, heartbreaks, disappointments, embarrassing moments, missed opportunities, dark nightmares. 
  Why you couldn't tell them? No reason? 
  If you had something and couldn't tell it, so can the other person. 
  Watch it before you ask literally everything that crosses your mind. Sometimes, trust isn't enough and that's okay. 
  
  
• Not everyone has the same world view.
  A problem can be solved in multiple ways is pretty common knowledge, what it implies, though, may be isn't - the difference in solution approaches is because not everyone is viewing the world with the same lens.
  The exact same experience, happening at the exact same point in time in two individuals' lives may be interpreted and impact them very differently. You may have made some conditions same, but you still haven't replicated their entire lives prior to that point - so their temperament is shaped quite far apart. 
  When you learn to accept this, you may become a little more at ease with people who are viewing the same situation in a whole different light than you. 
  
  
• Righteousness
  Knowing the right from the wrong is wisdom, choosing right over wrong is maturity (particularly because it's effortful and difficult making the right choices). What gets lost a tad bit with the whole right vs wrong debate is even if majority agrees on the righteousness of an action/choice, it'd need, however little, courage. For instance, most people would agree that taking a stand (for oneself or for another) is the right thing to do and yet it's so rare for people to do it that it comes across as a special trait in those who acted upon it. 
  
  
• The power of a clear conscience
  No matter what age, everyone has had traumatic experiences that could (or did) scar them for life. It could be an exam you failed, an interview you didn't clear, rejections you faced - the list is endless. What do you tell yourself to try and move on from these? That you tried your best or that you did the right thing or that it wasn't meant to be or that everything happens for a reason? All of these converge to a single point - clearing your conscience to not leave space for regret, disappointment or guilt. Why? It gears you up to give it your all for what's coming next in life. And much practically put - to sleep easy. 
  I'm no expert but I'm pretty sure when you're 50 years old, a clear conscience and the happiness that comes with it is definitely worth being proud of. 
  
  
• Self Compassion 
  Kindness toward others is important as it makes the world a better place. You can't get started on that unless you're kind to yourself, making your heart and mind a better place to live in because you live with yourself more than anyone else ever will. When you learn to cut yourself some slack, start celebrating your wins on your own first, it becomes a lot easier to translate that out into the world and truly be happy for another. 

Comedy - More Than Just a Content Genre

Comedy as a content genre is very close to my heart. It's helped me get out of bed on my anxiety-ridden days when I had no motivation left to do so. But I've come to appreciate it for more reasons than just that. 

Before I get to those (and couple other nuances of comedy), it'll be good to revisit the initial days of not just enjoying consuming comedy content but coming to truly acknowledge its importance in my life too. 

As an 18 year old (and much obviously stressed) IIT-JEE aspirant, I'd have frequent, random self-doubting, depressing, anxious thoughts that I just couldn't bring myself to share with anyone - friends or family. Call it the fear of judgement or embarrassment, but no amount of motivation could get words out of me. I had then turned to writing a little bit and more significantly, consuming random comedy content - standup shows, movies, cartoons (yes, I know that's funny but hey - desperate times, desperate measures, right?) or some tv shows like Wipeout etc. 
I didn't realize it back then but watching comic content worked as an effective distraction from all those negative, haunting thoughts - well, at least for a while if not permanently. And over the time I've come to realize that that's the hack we need to be functional or to even be able to concentrate on the task at hand - move the negative emotion out of focus or for the lack of a better word - dismiss it. 
So, the thing about comedy that's not given enough thought is the fact that it has the potential to put you in the bare minimum mental state to function normally in a circumstance you'd otherwise be depressed about and losing it. And it'll take you a first-hand experience to truly acknowledge this.

Now, the nuances of comedy that are, more often than not, overlooked:

1. The Perfect Ice-breaker.
Extrovert or introvert, breaking the ice with a stranger is (almost) equally difficult for both. Nothing better than a humorous reference or a witty comeback to get comfortable with strangers - off or on the internet. Point me to a person who doesn't appreciate a good comeback and I'll point you to a person that you probably shouldn't be in touch with anymore. [No responsibilities will be taken for broken "friendships" here though.]

2. The Life of the (house) Parties.
Every group of friends has that one person who thinks they're the glue holding the group together but we all know that the only reason every one shows up at that house party is getting to (re)watch all the sitcoms/movies you bonded over initially and all the anecdotes you all share around that.
This would be slightly untrue if the planner/host of the party is great at cooking. Then they probably are the glue holding the group together. [Go drop a 'hey' to them now if you haven't spoken in a while. This post will always be there to get back to.]
Also, at almost all get-togethers, we all end up mentioning and reliving the funny experiences, stories and having a good time - point being, humorous stories are the real glue. 

3. A Brilliant Personality Trait.
I don't have scientific proof ready to quote here but it wouldn't be completely wrong to say that people with a good sense of humor are immensely approachable, smart, calm, can think out of the box - or at the very least - help you see the funny side of even the bad times. They may not be certified but they make good therapists that way. [Midway disclaimer: Nobody is a replacement for therapists.] 

4. Base For Good Bonding.
I'm not an expert on the subject, but I highly doubt any two people have become good friends solving a calculus problem together or debugging code. I mean that happens but after you've become friends maybe but that's not the start of the bonding process. Bonding elements have always been movies, shows, music, sports etc. Almost never the "serious" stuff of life.
[Short, personal detail: Sitcoms have been my ticket to speaking to some random strangers who have now become my dearest friends. You'll know if you're one of them. *wink*]

5. Ageless, Timeless.
You know how they say when you can't laugh at the same joke twice, why cry about the same problem again? Well, they have a point there but I guess we do laugh at the same joke more than once. Hear me out: you can be watching your favorite sitcom for the 100th time and would still laugh just as hard. Hell, when it's been more than 30 minutes of deciding what to watch, you simply turn to that show or your bookmarked standup comedy videos. (Well, at least I do.) Comedy content simply doesn't grow old!

6. Loners' Best Companion.
If you have lived/live alone, people almost always go 'oh really? why?' when they discover that fact about you. Not necessarily looked down upon, but the reactions are certainly not appreciative or even like they're remotely able to understand it. I mean, I do understand most people wouldn't make that choice but still it's not all that bad. Because comic content is always there to save the day!
[Loners: give yourself a salute! You've decoded life! Well, at least to a certain extent.]
[Midway disclaimer #2: This is not a promotion of living by yourself.]

7. Unbeatable way to get across a point.
Wit/humor happens to be the best possible way to make a good point about a serious issue and get people to reflect on it too - if it hurt, it's the truth; if not, it was a joke. 

Ending it on a grateful note: I owe most of my times well spent to comedy content. This was, in a way, my tribute and a heartfelt appreciation to all the comedy content creators out there. If you're one and this has reached to you somehow, you've my eternal love and respect!

Every life is a package

Have you ever come across the question - if given a chance, would you exchange your life with someone else's? Or, Have you ever wished to exchange your life with someone simply because they're doing well in life or have achieved the things that you aim for? 

A spontaneous answer maybe 'yes' to these but after a deep thought and analysis, almost everyone ('almost' being the keyword here, obviously) will appreciate their own particular life or at the least, not complaint about their own hardships (as much). 

What's that deep thought or the analysis? - Everyone's life is a packaged deal. 

Well, life isn't a super market (and the world isn't run by a wish-granting genie) where you could hand-pick circumstances and hence the outcomes. You're a sum total of your circumstances, experiences, what you make of them, how you handle them. Basically, although it may not make a ton of sense at times or seem like it is all connected, that is the case (fortunately for the most part). It's like a chain of events where the preceding one may not appear like it would have resulted in the one following it but that is what is happening. If you're at station A, and there are 'n' stations that you could get to (directly) from A - your logics, thought process, people surrounding you, analysis of the outcomes of reaching each of  those stations, conditions at hand and most importantly, feasibility of the travel - the net total of these will decide where you actually end up. 
And much naturally, each of those 'n' stations could lead you to a whole other set of  'n' other points in life - that you could never have a clue about! 

Now, if you were to exchange your life with someone else's, you won't get to pick pieces out of it. Even if you did, it'd be constructing a whole new chain of events - and you may not like future parts of it! All in all, the trade won't be worth it. 

So when you look at someone living the life you wanted for yourself - or rather a piece of it - know that there's a good chance you were made to press the skip button on this particular piece only to land at a much better place than you could've possibly imagined!

Wrapping it up with a quote that I'm reminded of - 

"Nothing is ever as good or as bad as it seems"